You must first love yourself


The relationship you have with yourself is the most important one you will ever have.  What you think of yourself reflects so much of what you give to this world.

How you view yourself will affect every relationship in your life.

When you don’t believe that you are good enough, there’s a tendency to sabotage  the potential of being more, which can lead to the fear of not being enough. The self-talk you carry on within your thoughts  gives life to who you want to be.  If you are consistently putting yourself down with negative talk, you are harming yourself.

It’s important for you to praise yourself just like you would someone you love dearly.

I know this may seem impossible.  I am guilty of doing this myself, and the idea that I was worth more was hard for me to deal with. I made the negative excuses, played games with my thoughts, and criticized who I believed I deserved to be. Giving this negative talk the power only caused feelings of insecurity. By not embracing my imperfections, I gave way to the excuse that I didn’t have the strength, or the ability to do it right. The more you show up everyday to connect with who you want to be, the clearer it will be to find your authentic self. Using positive affirmations about oneself is a powerful tool.

What makes you vulnerable to life makes you beautiful.

It has taken many years for me to understand, and except that my vulnerabilities were also my strengths. I let fears of failure hold me back from succeeding in many areas of life.  I had more power and knowledge  then I was accepting. I have learned that by loving myself just the way I am gives me the foundation to be more, which energizes me to give with all my heart and soul.  When you give yourself permission to stop controlling and forcing, and instead, allow your vulnerabilities to show, you will begin to enhance the beauty within.

When you own your story, you get to write the ending.

Owning your story is never easy. If you stop and really think about it, embracing your  past is easier than running away from what belongs to you. As you grow, so should your story. Be willing to end a chapter that is holding you back. Be willing  to try new things, and to find a flow that works. When you make the choice to own your story, your struggles will not be able to take away your identity and you will be able to define who you are and who you want to be.

Self-love is not always quiet, easy or smooth. And, sometimes it screams really loud.

You will never be completely free from discomfort. Give yourself permission to be wrong, and to not always know the answers. To feel the discomfort or even the pain that is filling your thoughts.  There is nothing wrong with these feelings. What is wrong is when you hold them captive, and let them eat you alive.  Do not feel shameful for setting boundaries in order to heal. Self-care is about finding  peace  and love for who you are. It’s not about what others think of you. It’s about finding what works for you. It’s not about how much good you can receive, it’s about the perception of what you believe you deserve.

Give yourself grace.

You don’t need to pretend or prove that you have it all together. Every moment is time that is spent on learning to figure out who you are. Give yourself permission to be okay with where you are right now! The more you love yourself, the better you will feel. It’s about reminding yourself that you are in charge of the feeling you have.  Self-care is not a selfish act, it’s just the opposite.  If you care for yourself first,you will be able to give to others more freely. Breathe through the fears, or even take it a step further and speaks to them, or write them a letter, but whatever you do, don’t hide behind not liking who you are. Your inner self should be the only authority of your life.

Below are 10 self-love affirmations that will hopefully help you begin the process of building trust, confidence and love for yourself:

1. My life is a gift. I will use this gift with confidence, joy and exuberance.

2. I release my negative thoughts, embracing the positive.

3. I am beautiful.

4. I am unique and a beautiful soul.

5. I am worthy of love.

6. I am worthy of infinite and unending compassion.

7. Love rises from my heart in the face of difficulty.

8. I am powerful, confident, and capable of reaching all my dreams.

9. Success is defined by my willingness to keep going.

10. I am exactly who I need to be in this moment.

2 thoughts on “You must first love yourself

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